I am my own soul’s ultimate deceiver
For when I am to receive I am not the receiver
My eyes are blind making me a nonbeliever
My heart builds up wall
My mind comes up with tricks
I cannot have anyone overcome my walls of brick
I place myself within a box making me feel as sly as a fox
A place to hide, a place to stay
My eyes cloud my judgment but as far as I can see
Everyone else is the deceivers and that I’m the one who’s not deceived
For there’s self deception in everyone but me
My ability to blame seems to set myself free
For blaming is so easy to justify
Because everyone faults are easy to classify
I feel that I’m good, I feel that I’m well, and I tell myself I’m exactly where I should be
But then I feel my own guilt that starts to swell
My walls and my obstacles begin to build and fortify
For I have all the reasons to justify
But then my obstacles are made low and my wall begin to crumble
I begin to realize wrong that I’ve done and that I’m beginning to stumble
How could I at any point ever choose to once again be humble?
I then see a face so calm and not dismayed
A steady look that clearly said that help is on the way
A look that showed no disappointment but a look that whispers change
The face became familiar as one I had seen before.
So I stopped to look up this his face once more
So much was said for the lack of words and somehow I knew he understood
For I was reluctant to say that I had fallen along my way
I softly said I now realize that I am my own soul’s ultimate deceiver
After uttering these words I saw more than just his face
The Savior stood lovingly before me with arms open to embrace
He spoke unto me strongly but gently
Stating that through him he could make me the ultimate believer
My mind was opened, my walls broken down, my blindness was lifted, and my heart was reopened
I quickly learned that when I’m a believer that Christ through his love is the ultimate healer
My heart has found knowledge, my heart has found peace, and my soul can now breathe with a sigh of relief
So now when my weakness lies in wait to deceive I think of his face and start again to believe.
